My Playlist for the Past Week

The Script – Break Even

I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing
Just praying to a God that I don't believe in
Cause I got time while she got freedom
Cause when a heart breaks no it don't break even

Her best days will be some of my worst
She finally met a man who's gonna put her first
While I'm wide awake she's no trouble sleeping
Cause when a heart breaks no it don't break even, even, no

What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you?
What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're okay?
I'm falling to pieces, yeah
I'm falling to pieces...

They say that things happen for a reason
But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding
Cause she's moved on while I'm still grieving
And when a heart breaks no it don't break even, even, no

What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you?
What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're okay?
I'm falling to pieces, yeah
I'm falling to pieces...

You got his heart and my heart and none of the pain
You took the suitcase and none of the blame
Now I'm trying to make sense of what remains
Cause you left me with no love to my name

I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing
Just praying to a God that I don't believe in
Cause I got time while she got freedom
Cause when a heart breaks no it don't break even, even, no

What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you?
What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're okay?
I'm falling to pieces, yeah
I'm falling to pieces...


La Roux – BulletProof

Been there, done that, messed around
I'm having fun, don't put me down,
I'll never let you sweep me off my feet
I won't let you in again,
the message I've tried to send,
My information's just not going in.

Burning bridges shore to shore
I break away from something more
I'm not turned off to love until it's cheap

Been there, done that, messed around,
I'm having fun, don't put me down
I'll never let you sweep me off my feet

This time baby I'll be bulletproof
This time baby I'll be bulletproof

I won't let you turn around
and tell me now I'm much too proud
and walk away from something when it's dead

Do do do you dirty words come out to play
when you are heard?
There's certain things that should be left unsaid.

Tick tick tick tick on the watch
and life's too short for me to stop
Oh baby, your time is running out

I won't let you turn around
and tell me now I'm much too proud
All you do is fill me up with doubt

This time baby I'll be bulletproof
This time baby I'll be bulletproof
This time baby I'll be bulletproof
This time baby I'll be bulletproof

This time.
I'll be.
Bulletproof.

This time.
I'll be.
Bulletproof.

This time baby I'll be bulletproof
This time baby I'll be bulletproof

Taio Cruz – Break Your Heart

Now listen to me baby
Before I love and leave you -
They call me heart-breaker.
I don't wanna deceive you.

If you fall for me
I'm not easy to please
I might tear you apart
Told you from the start
Baby from the start

I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart
I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart
I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart
I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart

There's no point trying to hide it
No point trying to evade it
I know I got a problem
by doing this behavin'

If you fall for me
I'm not easy to please
I might tear you apart
Told you from the start
Baby from the start

I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart
I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart
I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart
I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart

And I know Karma's going to get me back
for being so cold
Like a big bad wolf, I'm born to be bad
bad to the bone
If you fall for me
I'm only gonna tear you apart
Told you from the start

I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart
I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart
I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart
I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart
I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart
I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart
I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart
I'm only gonna break break your
break break your heart



Fiona Apple – Sleep To Dream

I tell you how I feel, but you don't care
I say tell me the truth, but you don't dare
You say love is a hell you cannot bear
And I say gimme mine back and then go there - for all I care

I got my feet on the ground
And I don't go to sleep to dream
You got your head in the clouds
And you're not at all what you seem
This mind, this body
And this voice cannot be stifled by your deviant ways
So don't forget what I told you
Don't come around, I got my own hell to raise

I have never been so insulted in all my life
I could swallow the seas to wash down all this pride
First you run like a fool just to be at my side
And now you run like a fool
But you just run to hide, and I can't abide

I got my feet on the ground
And I don't go to sleep to dream
You got your head in the clouds
And you're not at all what you seem
This mind, this body
And this voice cannot be stifled by your deviant ways
So don't forget what I told you
Don't come around, I got my own hell to raise

Don't make it a big deal, don't be so sensitive
We're not playing a game anymore
You don't have to be so defensive
Don't you plead me your case, don't bother to explain
Don't even show me your face, ''cause it's a crying shame
Just go back to the rock from under which you came
Take the sorrow you gave and all the stakes you claim -
And don't forget the blame

I got my feet on the ground
And I don't go to sleep to dream
You got your head in the clouds
And you're not at all what you seem
This mind, this body
And this voice cannot be stifled by your deviant ways
So don't forget what I told you
Don't come around, I got my own hell to raise

___________________________________________________________________________________

Fiona Apple – Paper Bag

I was staring at the sky, just looking for a star
To pray on, or wish on, or something like that
I was having a sweet fix of a daydream of a boy
Whose reality I knew, was a hopeless to be had
But then the dove of hope began its downward slope
And I believed for a moment that my chances
Were approaching to be grabbed
But as it came down near, so did a weary tear
I thought it was a bird, but it was just a paper bag
Hunger hurts, and I want him so bad, oh it kills
'Cause I know I'm a mess he don't wanna clean up
I got to fold 'cause these hands are too shaky to hold
Hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love
And I went crazy again today, looking for a strand to climb
Looking for a little hope
Baby said he couldn't stay, wouldn't put his lips to mine,
And a fail to kiss is a fail to cope
I said, 'Honey, I don't feel so good, don't feel justified
Come on put a little love here in my void,' he said
'It's all in your head,' and I said, 'So's everything'
But he didn't get it I thought he was a man
But he was just a little boy
Hunger hurts, and I want him so bad, oh it kills
'Cause I know I'm a mess he don't wanna clean up
I got to fold 'cause these hands are too shaky to hold
Hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love
Hunger hurts, and I want him so bad, oh it kills
'Cause I know I'm a mess he don't wanna clean up
I got to fold 'cause these hands are too shaky to hold
Hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love
___________________________________________________________________________________

Fiona Apple – Shadow Boxer

Once my lover, now my friend
What a cruel thing to pretend
What a cunning way to condescend
Once my lover, and now my friend

Oh, you creep up like the clouds
And you set my soul at ease
Then you let your love abound
And you bring me to my knees

Oh, it's evil babe
The way you let your grace enrapture me
When well you know I'd be insane
To ever let that dirty game recapture me

You made me a shadowboxer, baby
I wanna be ready for what you do
I been swinging around 'cause
I don't know when you're gonna make your move

Oh, your gaze is dangerous
And you fill your space so sweet
If I let you get too close
You'll set your spell on me

So darlin' I just wanna say
Just in case I don't come through
I was onto every play
I just wanted you

Oh it's so evil, my love
The way you've no reverence to my concern
So I'll be sure to stay wary of you, love
To save the pain of once my flame and twice my burn

So I'm a shadowboxer, baby
I wanna be ready for what you do
I been swinging around at nothin
I don't know when you're gonna make your move

Yeah I'm a shadowboxer baby,
I wanna be ready for what you do
And I been swinging around me 'cause
I don't know when you're gonna make your move

___________________________________________________________________________________

WKU News and Events - Western Kentucky University

WKU News and Events - Western Kentucky University

zSHARE video - The Lobotomist.wmv.flv

zSHARE video - The Lobotomist.wmv.flv

Stomping Grounds by Pearl Denzy

Stomping Grounds by Pearl Denzy

Boom Boom Shhhhh
Went the sound of the train
that led me to the terrain
of my old stomping grounds

I've been away for far too long
trying to be someplace I don't belong
attempting to fight the urge within me
to go to where I'm me.

You see,
my father is 57 years old
and has live on this ground
in which my boots now stomp
his entire life
and all I wanted when I grew up was to be nothing like him
and to get the hell out of this place

All because I thought that my world would end being
One in 1200
Jefferson County
Allen's Daughter

Going to the same church
seeing the same people
having the same conversation
week after week after week

I thought I'll be better than that
Because you see I thought moving
made me stronger
made me smarter
made me sadder

See this country girl
tried that old city life

thought that my true stomping grounds
were hard sidewalks
taxi cab confessions
and temp work

I though this city has everything
well everything but my heart

All because I didn't want to be
One in 1200
Jefferson County
Allen's Daughter

Boom Boom Shh
went the sounds of the train
that led to someone else's stomping grounds

And I'm about to pick up my suitcase
when I look to the front of the station
and see my father
standing there with a sign that says
Welcome Home, Baby Girl

And I know that my boots have hit the right place

I love the Fountain

I Love the Fountain by Abigail Scott

I love the fountain because
it is so much fun

I love the fountain because it's the one place
where mom can't say
Don't get your shoes dirty, abigail

I love the fountain, even the way it sounds.

I love the fountain because
when you open your mouth
you are bound to catch at least one drop
or maybe a whole bunch of drops

I love the fountains because
everyone gets wet when they play in the fountain

even mom and dad

It's rain with sun.

I love the fountain!

And it's my favorite place because
mom and dad get in the fountain and yell and shout

because they think I'm going to drown

but I'm not.

It's just a fountain.

Rosie the Riveter by Sylvia Leigh

That's all aprt of the red, white, and blue
Working for victory.
Rosie the Riveter is my name,
kicking ass is my game.

Real name's Carol. That Rosie the Riveter shit
was just for them posters.

And, yes, before you starts asking
I know I how to cook
and I know how to clean
and no, I don't intend on doing either.

See I got this boyfriend...
his name's Chuck
and Chuck is a Marine
which means he knows how to do two things -
Fuck and Fight,
and boy can he
fight.

I love Chuck
Really, I do,
you know, we's gonna get married
soon as Chuck comes back from that war

But until that day comes

I'm filling in for good old Chuck.
See what I don't tell Chuck is
I've been working overtime on this here rivet machine...

See that handy dandy gun over there?
Without that gun
how do you think Chuck would fight them bad guys?

Ahmadiniejad speaks plainly to Obama

In the name of God, the Compassionate, the Merciful

Mr. Barack Obama

President-elect of the United States of America

I congratulate you on having gained the majority of the votes of those who took part in the election. As you know, the chances that God gives to his subjects pass swiftly. They can be used for the perfection of humanity and to the benefit of nations or, God forbid, to the detriment of nations.

I hope you will choose to honor the real interests of people and justice and equity over the insatiable appetites of the selfish minority. Use this chance to serve to the extent you can. And leave a good name behind for yourself.

People expect an immediate and clear response to the pressure for fundamental change in the American government's policies, both foreign and domestic. This is the desire of all the world's nations and of the American nation as well, and it should be the objective and basis of all your future government's programs and actions.

On the one hand, the American nation, which has spiritual inclinations, expects your government to focus its energy and will on serving the people; dealing with the current economic crisis; restoring the country's standing, morale and hope; eradicating poverty and discrimination; and renewing respect for individuals, their safety and their rights. It also expects policies that will strengthen the foundations of the family -- part of the teachings of the holy prophets, who are also revered in America.

On the other hand, the nations of the world expect an end to policies based on warmongering, invasion, bullying, trickery, the humiliation of other countries by the imposition of biased and unfair requirements, and a diplomatic approach that has bred hatred for America's leaders and undermined respect for its people. They want to see actions based on justice, respect for the rights of human beings and nations, friendship and non-intervention in the affairs of others. They want the American government to keep its interventions within its own country's borders.

In the sensitive Middle East region, in particular, the expectation is that the unjust actions of the past 60 years will give way to a policy encouraging full rights for all nations, especially the oppressed nations of Palestine, Iraq and Afghanistan.

The great civilization-building and justice-seeking nation of Iran would welcome major, fair and real changes, in policies and actions, especially in this region.

If steps are taken in the path of righteousness, toward the goal of carrying out the teachings of the holy prophets, it is hoped that almighty God will help and that the enormous damage done in the past will be somewhat diminished.

I ask the high God to grant all of humanity and all nations health and happiness, honor and prosperity, and to grant rulers and officials the ability to learn from the past and to use every chance to serve, to spread love and kindness, to eradicate oppression, to do justice and to follow the holy guidelines.

Mahmoud Ahmadiniejad

Entry X

Skin taut
over edges of bones fragments
the remnants
Sewn together with a
lace of leather
and spine

skin taut
is still smooth.

smooth enough
to persuade an audience
into a security
that does not exist

frayed ends of twine
spark a blaze of fear
and a willingness
to give up everything
so it can be safe.

fear cannot touch
the bag of bones i am
translucent flesh on brittle framework
pulls itself tgoether (from the inside)
for fear of fearing

terrorist bombs blaze
tearing into the sacks
of flesh and bone
forgotten humans
of a forgone humanity
lives lost so
WE THE PEOPLE OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
garner payback, retribution, idiocracy.

terrorists bombs blaze and
burn the pride of an american people
never more content with giving up
fundamental freedoms or
the right to keep one's thoughts
to one's self.

I'm only going to say this once,
and at the end of a long poem nonetheless.

9/11 WAS an inside job. The United States Government lies to its people to justify the removal of our basic rights. Some speculate that the phrase, "Al Quaeda" never existed before 9/11 and the media frenzy to place blame.
If you don't believe me, look at Pearl Harbor, the incident that justified US entry into WWII. In the weeks before Pearl Harbor, FDR took an especially aggressive stance toward Japan, severing trade agreements and the like. When the Japanese navy sent their destroyer fleet to Pearl Harbor, Australian patrols notified the US gov't WEEKS before the Japanese arrived. We had more than ample warning - which was purposely ignored by our leader. We all know that Pearl Harbor not only cost so many lives itself, but also prompted the slaughter of our soldiers during WWII. Obviously, we can't trust our PRESIDENTS to respect the sanctity of human life. Humans are not tools to make money with, you fucking assholes. We're HUMANS, and our lives are PRECIOUS. Get over the war-fever, you conservative fuckheads. You respect the "rights" of an unborn fetus, yet willingly send your own children to kill and be killed.

Our government currently has the right to arrest you, without reason, and hold you indefinitely in a place undisclosed to anyone. They can torture you, since we have openly violated the Geneva Conventions and resort to waterboarding. They have the right to enter your home without warning or warrant, and use the evidence from this unlwaful entry to incriminate you. They have the ability to monitor every word you speak, your driving habits, your internet actions. They have even justified the use of cameras on literally every street corner at traffic lights. Next time you're stopped at a red light, look at the utility poles until you see the camera that will be OBVIOUSLY recording you. Give it a big ol' fuck you for me.
That being said, it should be made known that before 9/11, our government was unable to legally do any of the above (although they probably would have anyway). It is through a strategy of fear and mistrust of our worldly neighbors that our government convinced us to give up our most basic right - the right to privacy.


If you think this isn't a problem, I'd like you to read 1984. And if you don't think that a situation like that could ever be possible...look around you. Try turning off your telescreen. Try going anywhere without being monitored. It won't happen, my friend.

And so ends my diatribe.

Good night and good luck.

For you...

The trees
speak to me.
The moss
speaks to me,
calling for my head to find its home.
I will lie in the dew and dream of a time
without time,
an ageless age behind
a gateless gate.
Join me here in my womb.

Join me in what creates
the intermost musings of man,
join me in what shapes you,
me,
and us.
Help me to carve out a place
in a land where the soil
sticks to my shovel instead of itself.

I dream of your hand cupping my face
in my sleep
I watch you watch me
and I know that what you see
is what I see.
I see wombs and birth,
I see pain and war,
I see death.
I see the tombs we've created for ourselves.
The money-man and the loss
of a place to call home.

With you in my head,
I cannot see the dark side
of anything.
With you in my head,
I cannot escape the rising sun
and the horizon that creeps to entangle me
in its wayward arms and digits.
I see only your arms.

I see your arms, reaching out
to me
from the land in which I was born.
Your hands are the rays of sun
warming my peaks,
my valleys,
my plains.
Your hands breathe a hope
onto a tundra long deserted.

You are my sun rising.
You are the dawn of a new age.
You are the arms that hold me
in my sleep,
sleep that brings you again to me.

Once I watched you sleep
and saw a possibility
bloom in your eyelids.
I watched the world create itself.
I watched the way you watched me.

You shine into me
and light me up from inside.
I cannot explain how I am tied to you
only that I am.
Let these bonds strengthen with age
and weather the passing of days
so that every night,
we can look over one another in a deep sleep.

Let us pass into sleep together and
cease to watch one another
watching.

Let us join paths,
looking together into the horizon,
at the sun that beams light onto our faces.
Let us look outward at the world together.

The world will look at us together,
and the world approves.

I've seen this all in your eyelids,
just before I kissed them.










ps -

Once I mouthed the words
that urge my lips to speak.
They fell from my clumsy attempt at a rescue,
onto your smooth forehead from my lips.
You did not notice the fumbling,
awkward touching of my lips to your skin.

You slept.
I watched.



Know that I only watch over the things that ask me to watch them, so keep asking.
Know that the way I feel about you...
it's nothing that's ever written poetry like this.
It's everything you put into me given back to you
and more.

Maybe gonna write

my phone died
when i was telling you
how wonderful you are

my friends think you're great,
and it really humbles me
to be your girlfriend.

You have
invigorated me
for the long winter,
made me ache to
feel the cold in my lungs
as I tippy-toe to kiss you.


When you look at me
I can't breathe
because I've never seen anyone
see me that way.

Maybe it's childish,
but I thought romance was dead.
I never wanted to be
swept off my feet
or taken unawares
and somehow,
you did both without pissing me off.
(haha)

Years have passed since
I've felt warm.
These toasty lips of mine
want to thank yours

I know this sounds
elitist,
but I never thought
I'd find so much...
of everything I've really been longing for
in a math major.

:D

But I am so glad I did.

You balance me,
you keep me standing on my own two feet,
if only so that I can reach up and kiss you.

Thank you so much for everything you've done for me. You've given me gifts that mean more to me than I am capable of telling you right now. I already can't see the screen because I'm trying not to cry.
And a tear just fell onto my hoodie.
Yes, the red one.
I have rediscovered laughter, and smiles, and cuddles, and kisses, and warm beds. I am learning what it's like to fall for a math major.

So here's a formula for you...

(U + me) / distance
______________
(temp in my bed when you're there) - (average temp of my bed)

=

The heat it takes to melt this girl's cold heart.

Mulan by Sylvie Leigh

I put away my silks
and took up my sword.
I wore my hair short
And bound my breasts.
Instead of his blessing
I carried the name of my father
On my back like my shield.

Sword in hand,
I fought
Men twice my age
Men my father’s age
from the back of a horse
Four times my size
I learned a man’s touch
from the blows of his sword.

I fought in battle next to the best of men
Not one knew I was not one of them
I was not one of them

My hair kept shorn
Close to my face
To hide behind my mask.
I lost myself.

I lost on some battlefield
Along with my blood
The ability to heal the wounds inside
With warmth
Like a woman does.

Ten years in the bitter cold
taught me
The foolishness of silk.
The long winters
stripped me to solid core,
My warrior spirit,


I was a warrior
Not a woman
I was a warrior
Not a woman
But I was.

When I returned home after ten years,
My favorite silk kimono
Still hung by my bedroom door.
And my hair grew back.
And my hands grew soft.

But I did not.

Lady Lonely

Back and forth,
back and forth,
back and forth,
the chair rocks the lady I'm sitting with.

It's not the highest functioning wing of the ward
which means,
this lady before me is pretty much shell.
A carcass of a human body,
a reminder that life is fragile and
can at the same time destroy our souls.

My ear tunes itself to the creaking
my foot subconsciously tapping to
the sound of
the rock-ing,
the rock-ing,
the rock-ing
like a bassinet cradles the young,
and like a mother over her baby's bed,
I watch the lady.

She's not sleeping,
but she's definitely not here
in the sense that
she can tell you what day it is
or what time it is
or what she ate for dinner
or her name

My heart beats in time with her breath
In-Hale
Ex-Hale
In-Hale
Ex-Hale
and the cat at her feet stirs its tail
in protest of the lazy September sun.

I come on Wednesdays
to be in her quiet company,
because at least then
I'm not sitting in silence
at home.
alone.

AST 300

A few non-traditional students in my class.
One has Johnny-Boy rolled up jeans and big black boots
Ink on his skin peeking out from the sleeves he's rolled up

It's a little bit poser

but a lot attractive.

What to do about that brooding man in the corner...

Haiku Night, Attempt #1

Hearts bigger in you
than your body seems to fit
beat in tune with mine.

Haikus are very hard.
Forget what your teachers say.
I can't write worth shit.

Poezzi Romanesti

A Poem

Tell me, if I caught you one day
and kissed the sole of your foot,
wouldn't you limp a little then,
afraid to crush my kiss?...

That night you looked at me and said confront...

I'm going to lay it out for you.


There are
far too many holes in
what used to be human
what used to be a woman
to focus on more holes.

Let me lie and
lick my wounds before
pouring the salt from your lips into them.

Because nothing scrapes and hurts
quite so much as you
and the honesty dripping from your tongue
you know,
that tongue that i like to feel on mine.
that tongue that has
been more places than you're willing to claim
as explored, as yours.

and no, i can't lie about this,
not to you,
because I love you.
Dearly, harshly,
fiercely,
in the only wounded way I know how,
I love you.
but it will never be enough.

And that's just one of those things
those things you say I'm afraid of confronting,
one of those things I'll say to you
before this night is through.
I have nothing to give,
I have no love,
so the world around me
seems without a doubt
warmer than my own arms.

And
let me abuse my body
let me fill it with
enough poisons to forget

let me
drink up to drown
those voices in my throat
screaming out against the way you make me feel in your arms

let me kill the parts of me that
still feel
so I don't care when
that boy kisses me
in front of you

it's the same parts of me
that don't feel a thing
when i look at him,
when I look at myself.

Somedays I forget that
I feel anything at all
until I look at you
and I know,
at least if it hurts,
I'm alive.

and it always does.

and I know,
I know.
Nothing in you
could ever love
a thing like me
I know.

So please,
let me get this out.
Let me tell you,
in a confrontation to kill what's left,
I would love you if I could.
and I know you would never love me
because...
you have yet to give me a good enough reason to make me think you would never love me.

Since pain is my most powerful sense,
please,
if you want to be my friend,
try your very best to destroy me.

I spent all my life begging
not to be hit,
touched,
fucked,
sucked,
licked,
hurt,
and scarred.
And tonight I'm confronting what I need
and that's pain, from your hand.

I will use that as my reason to forget you, to cleanse my mind of you, and the drugs, and the sex, and the need for anything. When I know that you, my dear friend who does not love me, will never love me, I'll know.
It's ok then. It will all be ok.

I want you to make my place known to me. What is it exactly that I deserve? I'm putting myself in your hands, as I have on so many other nights, and asking you to deem me worthy, with the full knowledge that I never will be, that I never can be. That I am flawed and fucked up and out of love. I'm out of love, babe. I can't make it come out of nowhere, I have none to give you, I don't know if I'll ever be in love again and that's a fucked up thing to know about yourself. And nothing anyone can say will change that or make it hurt any less.
But, oh...pain. Welling up just enough to leak onto my cheeks and leave me. The only constant I feel, but at least I feel it.

not broken

"and I guess I'm not broken if im meant to be this way"

what is meant to be?
the
supplications of the beggar
pleading to walk
instead of hang
ring out over the city square
and the people echo

"meant to be"

the divinations
of the preaching choir
float down from those rafters.

"meant to be"

the tears spread
over the page
of the book
of the man
whose hands hold me

and he says, "meant to be"

and I am the only person in this town
who thinks I am NOT meant to be this way.

that dangerous work

and it's dangerous work
getting through that
muck and mire
to try my luck
at another hand
in your games

your games shame me
turn me into the fool
you know me as
and all i can whisper
as I lose another hand
is there any way to win?

and it's dangerous work
getting through that
muck and mire
to try my hand
at another hand
in your games

the seas
are quite too cool
but at least
they don't lie to me.

Fiona Apple Sings for me...

This is not about love
'Cause I am not in love
In fact I can't stop falling out
I miss that stupid ache

_____

I'm gonna make a mistake
I'm gonna do it on purpose
I'm gonna waste my time
'Cause I'm full as a tick
And I'm scratching at the surface
And what I find is mine
And when the day is done, and I look back
And the fact is I had fun, fumbling around
All the advice I shunned, and I ran
Where they told me not to run, but I sure
Had fun, so
I'm gonna f*** it up again
I'm gonna do another detour
Unpave my path
And if you wanna make sense
Whatcha looking at me for
I'm no good at math
And when I find my way back,
The fact is I just may stay, or I may not
I've acquired quite a taste
For a wellmade mistake
I wanna mistake why can't I make a mistake?
I'm always doing what I think I should
Almost always doing everybody good
Why
Do I wanna do right, of course but
Do I really wanna feel I'm forced to
Answer you, hell no
I've acquired quite a taste
For a wellmade mistake, I wanna
Make a mistake, why can't I make a mistake
I'm always doing what I think I should
Almost always doing everybody good
Why

______
Can't take a good day without a bad one
Don't feel just to smile until I've had one
Where did I learn

I make a fuss about a little thing
The rhyme is losing to the riddling
Where's the turn

I don't want a home, I'd ruin that
Home is where my habits have a habitat
Why give it a turn

I've got a plan, a demand and it just began
And if you're right, you'll agree

Here's coming a better version of me
Here it comes a better version of me
Here it comes a better version of me
________

Oh, honey
(I've gone away)

Won't do no good
To sing no love song
No sound could simulate
The presence of a man
Won't do no good
Asking no questions
Your divination should
Acquaint you with the plan

Oh, honey
(I've gone a)
Oh, honey
(I've gone a)
Oh, honey
(I've gone away)

My feel for you, boy
Is decaying in front of me
Like the carrion
Of a murdered pery
And all I want is
To save you, honey
You can't intimidate me
Back into your arms

Oh, honey
(I've gone a)
Oh, honey
(I've gone a)
Oh, honey
(I've gone away)

My feel for you, boy
Is decaying in front of me
Like the carrion
Of a murdered prey
And all I want is
To save you, honey
Or the strength
To walk away

_______

Criminal lyrics
I've been a bad bad girl
I've been careless
With a delicate man
And it's a sad sad world
When a girl will break a boy
Just because she can
Don't you tell me to deny it
I've done wrong and
I want to
Suffer for my sins
I've come to you
'Cause I need
Guidance to be true
And I just don't know
Where I can begin
What I need is
A good defense
'Cause I'm feelin'
Like a criminal
And I need
To be redeemed
To the one
I've sinned against
Because he's all
I ever knew of love

Heaven help me
For the way I am
Save me from
These evil deeds
Before I get them done
I know tomorrow brings
The consequence at hand
But I keep livin' this day like
The next will never come

Oh help me but
Don't tell me to deny it
I've got to cleanse myself
Of all these lies till
I'm good enough for him
I've got a lot to lose
And I'm bettin' high
So I'm beggin' you
Before it ends
Just tell me where to begin

What I need
Is a good defense
'Cause I'm feelin'
Like a criminal
And I need
To be redeemed
To the one
I've sinned against
Because he's all
I ever knew of love

Let me know the way
Before there's hell to pay
Give me room to lay
The law and let me go
I've got to make a play
To make my lover stay
So what would an angel say
The devil wants to know

What I need
Is a good defense
'Cause I'm feelin'
Like a criminal
And I need
To be redeemed
To the one
I've sinned against
Because he's all
I ever knew of love

What I need is
A good defense
'Cause I'm feelin'
Like a criminal
And I need
To be redeemed
To the one
I've sinned against

Because he's all
I ever knew of love
_______

If there was a better way to go then it would find me
I can't help it, the road just rolls out behind me
Be kind to me, or treat me mean
I'll make the most of it, I'm an extraordinary machine

I seem to you to seek a new disaster every day
You deem me due to clean my view and be at piece and lay
I mean to prove I mean to move in my own way, and say,
I've been getting along for long before you came into the play

__________

I let the beast in too soon, I don't know how to live
Without my hand on his throat; I fight him always and still
Oh darling, it's so sweet, you think you know how crazy
How crazy I am
You say you don't spook easy, you won't go, but I know
And I pray that you will
Fast as you can, baby runfree yourself of me
Fast as you can
I may be soft in your palm but I'll soon grow
Hungry for a fight, and I will not let you win
My pretty mouth will frame the phrases that will
Disprove your faith in man
So if you catch me trying to find my way into your
Heart from under your skin
Fast as you can, baby scratch me out, free yourself
Fast as you can
Fast as you can, baby scratch me out, free yourself
Fast as you can
Sometimes my mind don't shake and shift
But most of the time, it does
And I get to the place where I'm begging for a lift
Or I'll drown in the wonders and the was
And I'll be your girl, if you say it's a gift
And you give me some more of your drugs
Yeah, I'll be your pet, if you just tell me it's a gift
'Cause I'm tired of whys, choking on whys,
Just need a little because, because
I let the beast in and then;
I even tried forgiving him, but it's too soon
So I'll fight again, again, again, again, again.
And for a little while more, I'll soar the
Uneven wind, complain and blame
The sterile land
But if you're getting any bright ideas, quiet dear
I'm blooming within
Fast as you can, baby wait watch me, I'll be out
Fast as I can, maybe late but at least about
Fast as you can leave me, let this thing
Run its route
Fast as you can [x4]

_________

How many times can it escalate
Till it elevates to a place I can't breathe?
And I must decide, if you must deride
That I'm much obliged to up and go
I'll idealize, then realize that it's no
Sacrifice, because the price is paid, and
There's nothing left to grieve
Fuckin go-
Cuz I've done what I could for you, and I do know what's
Good for me and I'm not benefiting, instead
I'm sitting singing again, singing again, singing again,
Sing, sing, sing again
How can I deal with this, if he won't get with this
M'I gonna heal from this; he won't admit to it
Nothing to figure out; I gotta get him out
It's time the truth was out that he don't give a
Shit about me

_______

Waxing Poetic

The maybes of you and me
paralyze me
and pin me to my sheets
in tears.
I haven't felt this afraid in a long time
which means
I haven't been this honest
in just as long.

I may not feel safe
but I don't feel unsafe
and that's the first step, I suppose.

I'm not asking you to make any promises to me
but
I will humbly ask you
to tread lightly
if you don't intend to stay here.

Because the best of your intentions
might make it hurt less
but real love
takes chances.